Role models teach us things we can pay forward
Early in Denis McGee’s career, his boss wrote in his performance evaluation, ‘Denis does not tolerate fools gladly.’ That assessment rang true to Denis, but in a review meeting his boss told him the downside of the evaluation was that although he was seen as smart, he might sometimes come across as a bit too smart. His style irritated people. If he continued trying to prove he was the sharpest knife in the drawer, he would not bring his stakeholders along with him. It was a life-altering conversation. The last thing he wanted was to put people off.
Denis ended up having a stellar career, finding friends and advocates all around the globe. Fast forward some 20 years or more and Denis gave the same feedback to a leader on his team. She had burst into his room, closed the door and let him have it with an avalanche of criticisms. Denis gave her two options. If she wanted to continue this way, she might as well submit her resignation now. Alternatively, they could talk about the problems calmly and work out possible solutions. She chose the latter option, and they had a constructive conversation.
Denis was able to draw on what he’d learned through his own experience of bringing people along with him. He found himself giving this manager similar feedback to what he’d received from his boss all those years ago. He told her that her abrasive style was not working for her. She was surprised by his feedback, declaring that no one had ever told her that before. To her credit, she took it as a constructive contribution, and she transformed her behaviour.
She, in turn, will pay it forward in much the same way Denis did. Taking on a contribution from role models makes a difference to you and the lives you touch.
These leadership insights from Denis McGee are outlined in more detail in the new book, which Dean Phelan and I co-authored – The Gentle Art of Leadership. The perspectives we gathered from our interviews with 50+ leaders from around the globe and the original research we drew on, form the basis of the book.
🙋♀️ Do you have role models who give you constructive feedback? 🙋
PS: Develop your ability to be a role model in the next Personality and Behaving Transactionally Program.
Best regards, Brian